Grownups

They say, the older we grow, the wiser we become. There are innumerable equivalent sayings for this statement in all languages and all regions. One conjures up mental visions of a distinguished looking person with white hair, each of which denotes infinite wisdom, upon reading this statement.

Do we really become wise as we become older? Upon pondering this question, I conclude it is not necessarily true. Of course, one might ask what exactly 'wise' means here. Answering that simple question requires a lot of wisdom. Do I have it? I do not know. Do you have it? Since you are a reader of this blog, I have to conclude that you do. Now, is that a 'wise' conclusion? Not necessarily. I conclude that the reader is wise, so as to not cause offense. But a wise person may not base a conclusion on such considerations.

Let us put this poser to a young person who is, say, all of five years. Would this person's conclusion be the same? Not at all. Since this person is young, (s)he would not understand the niceties and protocols we as adults follow. So, this person's conclusion would be more direct and simple, and may return a verdict of 'not wise'. When we are young, the world is black and white, without any shades of grey. One either likes something or does not. There is no 'Oh I should not offend this person, so I will pretend to like it, and later express my true feelings out of earshot'.

There are innumerable examples to support this. When I was young, I was playing cricket with a few of my (grown up) relatives. We had a good game going, but there was a point when I called one of the players (my grandmother's brother, actually, a really nice gentleman) a 'cheat' in front of everybody. I did so because he had been bowled out, but did not give up his bat. To me, that was cheating, and hence the verbal outburst. There is no way I would do that now, since I am an adult, and we adults do not call a spade, a spade. But, as an adult, would that be a 'wise' choice? No, because it is cheating, and yes, because the person is so senior that respect comes first.

It is not possible to be truthful always. Remember Jim Carrey in "Liar Liar". For those who are not familiar with this film, Jim Carrey is a lawyer who lies his way through life, till one day his son wishes that he speak the truth for one whole day. The travails of the truthful lawyer is captured nicely. This film highlights why we use euphemisms and politeness to mask our true feelings.

That said, I myself cannot help but follow politeness in life. Calling someone a 'cheat' would land me in trouble, even if I were right.

And kids always wish to be grownups!